Attachment

Our early formative experiences create a blueprint for our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors later in life. Experiencing rejection, neglect, trauma, or other relational injuries impacts our sense of safety and distorts our core beliefs about belonging, worth, and lovability. This, in turn, hinders our ability to show up authentically and experience genuine connection with others, ultimately creating a repetitive cycle of painful disconnection—but therapy can help break this cycle!

Lastly, while training in Somatic Experiencing®, I was introduced to the work of Dr. Diane Poole Heller.I have completed Modules I – IV of Dr. Heller’s Dynamic Attachment Re-patterning experience (DARe). DARe is an approach that focuses on helping individuals create more meaning, connection, and emotional intimacy in their relationships by processing early attachment wounds and identifying individual attachment styles.

Attachment lies at the core of everything we say and do. It's impossible to talk about good mental health without it.

Our most early relationships shape us. How our needs are met, or not, leave an imprint on our sense of self on a deep, non-verbal level. Our attachment styles are formed by 5 years of age, and we develop core survival strategies to get our needs met in relationships, at the expense of oneself. Therapy can help you heal your relationship with yourself, and reimagine how you'd like to be in relationship with those most important to you.

Attachment styles are the way we act and react in relationships. It is formed early in life by our first caregivers and then greatly influenced by relationships we have throughout our lives. I believe that attachment styles are as unique as fingerprint. When individuals and couples have a deeper understanding their attachment styles, communication and connection have the opportunity to grow.

Our attachment styles develop when we are young. These patterns affect the way we relate in relationships during both easy and challenging moments. Experiential and practical exercises will help you know your own attachment style. You will find tools to support you to lean into relationships that are healthy as well as learn to ask for what you need and set appropriate boundaries. The capacity to lean into someone, to trust someone and let them trust you, is a great gift.

Attachment Theory is paramount in the work that I do with my clients. I utilize psychoeducation with my clients to help them understand Attachment Theory and how that relates to the emotional bond they feel with others, particularly with their partner. I help my clients identify their attachment styles. Once they can identify their style, they can understand what they are longing for and be able to communicate their needs to their partner in a healthier, more effective way.

I recognize the importance of attachment style and early childhood experiences on how to navigate relational issues and insecurities.

I have specialty training in how trauma suffered during childhood impacts ongoing attachment styles. This is my primary area of expertise.

As babies, we come into the world quickly forming relationships with our caregivers. Those caregivers can either be a source of safety and connection or a distant or harsh parent. As children dependent on our caregivers we begin to create safety for ourselves in any way we can. As we grow older we carry these ways of survival with us which plays out in our adult relationships. These may manifest in us as codependency, low self-esteem, and people-pleasing.

Early formative attachment relationships set the stage for relationships going forward. By more thoroughly understanding yourself in relationships, we can begin to find more fulfilling ways of showing up in our relationships.

A large part of the work that I have done in infant mental health is working on building attachment and increasing security in relationships. Attachment is important in every relationship, and I know how to help create and maintain secure attachments even if you have a pattern of insecure attachment in your life.

As an attachment based therapist, I view the therapy process through a relational lens. I explore how your responses to stress and conflict are influenced by your unmet attachment needs. I utilize attachment theory to help you highlight your vulnerable emotions and relational needs, to guide you in the development of self-advocacy skills.

Our early formative experiences create a blueprint for our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors later in life. Experiencing rejection, neglect, trauma, or other relational injuries impacts our sense of safety and distorts our core beliefs about belonging, worth, and lovability. This, in turn, hinders our ability to show up authentically and experience genuine connection with others, ultimately creating a repetitive cycle of painful disconnection. Therapy can help break the cycle.

There is a theory that all psychologic issues stem from attachment wounds and that everyone one has attachment wounds. Now, I'm not sure if that is really true, but we at least all have a first heartbreak. I have helped with deep attachment issues such as, Reactive Attachment Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, and chronic codependence. Your attachment wounds may not be that severe, but they are may still be negatively affecting your relationships in ways you don't realize.

How we attach to others has to do with who we are attaching to, how we see ourselves and what connection has looked like in the past. We often what to ascribe responsibility to someone for the level of discomfort and hurt that comes as a result of attachment challenges but the work of therapy is to shift from blaming or shaming to a place of care, curiosity and emotional security. Regardless of what causes the attachment wound, each situation is an opportunity for a correct experience.

As a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional and Certified Brainspotting practitioner, my knowledge and approach centers attachment issues throughout a person's lifespan.