Attachment Theory

Attachment theory, the psychological basis of relationship creation and fracture, has been my focus for decades, resulting in my new book, Traumatic Experiences of Normal Development, available on Amazon. It offers a new psychoanalytic understanding of trauma and its effect on attachment. Consciously or unconsciously, we have all been traumatized. It helps us to effectively treat anxiety, depression, crisis, trauma, addictions, eating disorders, affairs/infidelities, and relational patterns.

Attachment theory suggests that the relationships we had with our caretakers early in life create an attachment style which is then carried into all subsequent relationships throughout the lifespan. About half of the population has developed an insecure attachment style as a result of attachment wounds in their primary relationships. These wounds are then carried into relationships and prevent them from finding the security they desire.

💞 Attachment-Based Therapy Attachment-Based Therapy explores how your early relationships impact your current sense of safety, self-worth, and connection. Together, we’ll unpack old relational patterns and create new, healthier ones. You’ll learn to set boundaries, trust yourself, and build more secure, meaningful relationships—with others and with yourself.

Attachment-Based Therapy is a wonderful, life-changing approach to healing and psychological restoration. It helps adults and children build strong and meaningful relationships with their family members, friends, significant others, and communities. A lot of times, childhood trauma leads to unsatisfying relationships. This type of therapy allows clients to identify and heal from their trauma in order to live a fulfilling life.

I specialize in Attachment Theory, helping clients understand how early relational experiences shape their current patterns in love, trust, and connection. I guide individuals and couples in identifying insecure attachment styles, healing past wounds, and fostering secure, fulfilling relationships. My approach integrates deep emotional work with practical tools, supporting clients in developing healthier bonds, enhancing intimacy, and breaking cycles of anxiety, avoidance, or disconnection.

The way that we form connections to other people is essential in our survival and happiness as humans. By understanding our attachment style and what scares us in relationships, we can learn, grow, and develop healthier relationships.

My approach is kind and thoughtful, but I am relentless in seeking to understand how a client's attachment patterns hold sway over their relational life. The words I use with clients are intentionally attuned to give voice to their deepest longings. When clients express these needs and experience validation is when the deep healing begins. Hidden push-pull forces of anxiety and disconnection give way to vulnerable requests and acceptance.

Through my work and training as a couples therapist I have come to understand that we are social creatures and we need to feel safe. The way we were nurtured as children impact the way we form attachments now and they affect every aspect of our identity especially our relationships with others. One of the main approaches I use comes from an attachment lens. As a couples counselor I work with couples to strengthen their connection with their partner to heal attachment wounds.

The quality and shape of our most important relationships are central to the way we see ourselves, others, and the world. We heal through our relationships with others and with ourselves -- that is what it means to be human.

I utilize attachment theory in my practice to help you understand the bond with your newborn, addressing any attachment challenges or disruptions. By exploring early experiences and attachment styles, I guide you in fostering secure attachments, promoting healthy bonding, and resolving issues like postpartum depression or anxiety, ultimately supporting the parent-child relationship.

I work from an attachment perspective to de-escalate the problematic interactional cycle maintaining attachment insecurity and relationship distress by creating a therapeutic alliance and accessing unacknowledged primary emotions. Working from an attachment perspective allows individuals and couples access in underlying attachment-related emotions and the needs associated with these emotions opens the individual, couple, and/or family to address needs in new ways.

Attachment theory is one of the keys to understanding yourself and your patterns in relationships. Attachment work in therapy is crucial to helping you strengthen the relationship you have with yourself and with other people. Working on attachment issues can help relationships make more sense and flow with more ease. This work is a game changer when it comes to finding and maintaining healthy, satisfying, long-lasting relationships.

Attachment theory explains how early relationships with caregivers shape our emotional development and ability to form secure bonds as adults. Secure attachment, characterized by trust, safety, and emotional availability, fosters resilience, empathy, and healthy relationships, while insecure attachments can lead to difficulties with relationships and emotional regulation. By exploring attachment in a safe therapeutic space, clients can develop healthier ways of relating to themselves and others.

The roots of attachment influence our relationships, self esteem, and give us a secure base from which we live. Understanding our own attachment and how it impacts us is a key focus of therapeutic work.

I have found that exploring the theory of attachment with some of my clients can help us understand the relational dynamics in our ongoing relationships, such as family, life-long friends, and romantic relationships, among others. Attachment theory can be very insightful as it helps us see how we relate to the world and how we perceive other people in our lives.

I draw heavily on Allan Schore's Modern Attachment Theory, which reframes traditional attachment theory into emotional regulation theory. I have a deep understanding of attachment thanks to my curiosity about the root cause of attachment behaviors like avoidance (hypoarousal) and anxiousness (hyperarousal).

Scientific evidence shows that not having our needs responded to consistently and kindly throughout the first few years of our brain's development can have a long-lasting impact on how we respond to our own needs and the needs of others. Few of us make it through these years without a few neuroses, as the first few years of a child’s life are often the toughest years for their parents’ relationship! My therapy helps folks identify and heal these wounds, to move toward relational security.